MOTHER IN LAW PART 6

What would make a mother want to give her son a second wife, I thought? I flipped through the pages of the book as we were driving home, and noticed it was all about prayers and silence. Being slow to anger and believing things could change through prayers. This won’t work with this woman I’m about to go spend time with.

The first couple of days were critical in both ways by our carefulness but from the third day, we started stepping on toes. E channel was an abomination in the house, and African magic was the main channel. It was a particular movie that was about to cause the next problem. We were both in the sitting room that afternoon when the movie started. A particular pregnant woman was walking home from the market, and a spirit entered her. She became possessed and the blessing of pregnancy became a curse. She started shaking her head as the movie preceded and afterwards told me if I knew all these things are possible. 

The woman really suffered though, but it was just a good act. All the native doctors couldn’t do anything to salvage her out of that situation. It was those white garment pastors that supported the situations. The pains were enormous for her. The real story was the spirit was looking for where to reside; thus it saw a woman that was prayer less and turned her womb to its residence. 

I thank God I pray so I wouldn’t need that.  We watched African magic from that day to learn the so called mama lesson. Expectation of witches and spirits to attack me grew in her mind, and suddenly she told me one particular evening we are visiting a place the next day. I didn’t understand what she meant until the next day. I had thought it was a friendly visit, until I discovered we were leaving the Abuja metropolis into a suburb. 

It was a local church built with woods and everyone wore white. I was told to pull my shoes the same way she did. I called mama aside and asked what we came here for. She blinked to me like I needed to respect where we were, thus I kept quiet. We were told to kneel down and they prayed for us. The prayer was the shortest I’ve ever seen. As the prayer was going someone inside the church compound started rumbling in a language that sounds distortive and another one started translating. I wanted to laugh at the comedic activity but with your mother in law in attendance silence was golden. The translator started with the fact that I was pregnant and that the baby would be a boy. Where is the scanner around I thought? He continued by saying the future of the child is very bright; that when he was trying to look at the future it was too bright for him to see.  Thus the child needs to be protected under the shadow of the almighty, through his apostles. 

I didn’t understand so well but I’ve made up my mind that whenever we leave this place I would go back to church for a proper cleansing. It looked fetish a little to me. Let we could have said we have finished they brought three different oils for me to rub on my body and put inside the water I would use to bath. I don’t know if I was supposed to pour it inside the shower but I collected everything because I knew I was going to throw it away. 

He brought plenty water also labelled holy and said I can do anything with the water. It seems he was a doctor but the last straw broke my camel’s back when I heard what they were discussing

The supposed man of God has called me into an inner room that has a small slab that looked like an altar. He had told me to pull my clothes and lie on the cloth provided on the altar-like slab. I asked him what he wanted to do, and he swiftly told me he wanted to use his sperm which is anointed, to protect my baby from the eyes of the enemies. He walked close to me and started rubbing his dirty hands on me. I gave him a dirty slap that called attention and walked out of his office and their shrine. I didn’t even go to the car I just kept walking. The man came out and told some boys in the church to pursue me and bring me back, telling grandma a spirit is controlling me already, that the spirit is the cause for my refusal.

 As they were approaching I saw a keke-napep carrying two passengers. I waved the keke driver and he stopped. I hopped in and told him to run. Immediately he moved I knew I have escaped but before we got to the next junction; a white handkerchief was placed on my nose. It had a choking smell and as I was struggling with them I lost my strength. It was the worst experience I ever had. What I ran away from on an altar-like slab I just gave to three dirty keke driver for three straight days…………

MOTHER IN LAW PART 5

It took lots of convictions and grumbling before mama accepted to sleep in the living room. We packed her bibles and devotionals and put it beside her for consolation. The TV was on till morning; leaving it on TBN (trinity broadcasting network) to support the bible in the pursuit of the demon that is causing bad dreams. At the end of the day it was a sleepless night. 

Mama woke us up three times before dawn.

First time was like an hour after we left her. She knocked the door to our room and said she needed to pee. Mama, there is a toilet for visitors in the sitting room and you walk pass it to wake us up. I left her with Patrick. There was a second and a third; I wasn’t interested anyway. 

I was the first to wake up. I sneaked into the kitchen to make mama’s food for the day. Breakfast, lunch and dinner were made before 7.30 in the morning and I rushed to the bathroom to bath. I was dressed when Patrick came out of the bathroom and he started laughing. You’re running from mama right? Before nko I said…… the table was set and I was fully dressed. I walked to mama’s room and told her where she could find her food when she is ready to eat. I sarcastically gave her a hug with “mama I love you”. She asked where I was going and I responded. I have training. How many days is the training my daughter. Just three months.

This went on for the next one week before she finally agreed to the fact that she has little no control over me in my house. The second week saw Patrick travelling again. With mama still in the picture; the stage was set for the royal rumble. He was just going to Kaduna but would be there for three to four days. 

I called mama immediately Patrick travelled and told her the new rules and regulations in the house. I told her I don’t like noise and she should be staying more in her room. I explained how well I don’t enjoy her conversations that sounded like gossip or a trail to hatred on people I have not even met and on and on ……

The second day mama was up as early as 6 am. Immediately light broke up the day she called her driver and dragged her bags out. I walked into the living room to confirm what was happening. To my surprise I saw mama and her bags. My daughter I’m going back home. Ah mama, why now. You don’t want to stay with us again? I thought you’ll be with us for a while…. Mama I’ll miss you. I kept on saying this as I helped mama drop her things inside her car. My acts have worked out well and peace has been restored.

I called Patrick while mama was still in the house to inform him of mama’s departure back to Maitama house. He spoke with his mum and suddenly the call was ended.

I never knew mama had plans before; she hasn’t just said anything.

Men are the weakest vessels in the world. Everything and everybody controls them. Just a little trigger makes a man act up. All they posses are muscles (no brains).  Patrick had come back home with a weird reaction mood. Everything I did was irritating. I suddenly became disrespectful. He stopped eating at home and whenever I asked him what was wrong he sparked at me saying, I nag too much. The mum became the best friend. I tried to talk to him but it wouldn’t work thus I called my own mother. I told her what was happening and she called Patrick to find out what the situation was. Only God knows what Patrick told my mum, but the next thing I knew, was a family meeting on my case. I had to apologise to mama; one of the hardest things to do. But with my mum in attendance, I had to respect family values on respect. I knelt down for mama to apologise. She shed her crocodile tears again, and in my mind I knew I would do it again and again…

The peace we once had was restored again and I have my man back. It wasn’t a good contest between mother and wife, but one has to stand the case. I was serving breakfast one early morning when I suddenly started feeling dizzy. I tried dropping the plates not to break it but fell down. Patrick was scared as he hurriedly rushed me to the hospital. After many test and observations the doctor confirmed I was pregnant. I was happy and Patrick was happier. I am fully a wife now…… but the problem started when Patrick called mama to notify her. She gave a reply that she’s coming to join us to support. 

I don’t want mama around but little can I say now. I kept praying that she cannot come and my prayer was answered.  The first month passed without mama but the unanticipated happened when the Niger delta militants damaged the main pipe line. Most workers were summoned to bonny island to help in repairs. That would see Patrick leaving in less than 48 hours for a trip we don’t know when he is coming back. He can’t allow me stay at home alone in my condition thus he told mama to come. Mama came but with no bags and told Patrick it is better she joins me at the mansion. I stopped at a bookshop to buy books on learning how to stay with a mother in law and there I saw this book: THE POWER OF A PRAYING WIFE. I got that for myself but mama bought: GETTING A SECOND WIFE…….

MOTHER IN LAW PART 4

Settling down wasn’t difficult for mama. Has she entered her room; I took her driver to the room at the boy’s quarters. The first complain from mama was the colour of the bed sheet and curtains. She hates red as she said though. Thus we had to look for brighter colours to change the fabrics in the room.

Rushing out of room’s adventure; I had to make breakfast for my mother in law. I got the normal cereal and set all for tea. Toasted the bread and fried the sausage. Garnished the sides with fried eggs also. While all was set walked into mama’s room to tell her table was set. She said thank you my daughter. 

She walked to the dinning and called us to join her. I just finished having my bath so Patrick was on the table first. I got myself clothed and hurriedly came out of the room to join mama for breakfast. Surprisingly she was not eating. She said on Sundays she eats fried rice for breakfast, pounded yam for lunch and fries for dinner. I nearly fainted when I heard this. It simply means there is a time table for mama’s food and I’m about to obey. 

I started the fried rice preparation, and in thirty minutes it was ready. I served her and she commented on how good it was. That was the only good thing about the morning. I have totally lost my appetite, but I knew I had to eat. I got a glass of juice for myself and tried to rest a little. When the sitting room bell banged twelve noon; mama walked outside to the living room for the second part of disturbance in one day. Patrick ooooh, Mati ooooh, that’s the worst way to call my name. Grudgingly we came out to see mama wearing her goggles, with three bibles and two devotionals. Since we didn’t go to church today, let us pray.

We sang three boring songs before she noticed I didn’t cover my hair. I got a scarf and joined them again. We had to sing those songs again and afterwards the prayers started.

We started with Our Father, followed by three Hail Mary and one glory be to the father…….

Mama: In Jesus name

Father we thank you for this wonderful Sunday. You had made it Sunday and not Monday. If you wanted it to be Monday, it would have been Monday but you preferred Sunday. Accept our thanks in Jesus name. Lord we particularly gather this morning to pray for fruits of the womb. We stand against the spirit of barrenness, Father, come and break it loose. We pray against any familiar or unfamiliar spirit, there are people who are ogbanje and they didn’t know some are witches and they didn’t know… hmmm Father we commit Matilda our daughter into your fatherly hands, that any occult she might have joined consciously or unconsciously come and break her loose in Jesus name. Being pregnant is not difficult we know, and she is still not pregnant Father, I waste the blood of Jesus on her. Loose her o lord. Break her away from them. Let her be your child. Any covenant she might have struck with those people Father, come and break it in Jesus name. We glorify you Father …… in Jesus name we pray amen  

So Patrick said baby say the Grace for us

Matilda: may the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, the love of God and the sweet fellowship of the Holy Spirit, rest and abide with us; teach us to be good mothers, teach us not to come and ruin people’s home, teach us not to suspect our daughters as ogbanje or occultic in nature, teach us how to stay in our houses and teach our husbands also to talk when necessary…. This and many more we ask through Christ our lord.

And nobody said Amen.

The service was over without opening the bible. Messages have been sent across to whoever can understand. I need to stand up to this woman before she frustrates life out of me. Here is the man I married who always allows things to pass. I called Patrick to the room and told him I won’t be staying at home with mama. Truthfully I’ll be going out before you and when you get back home; call me I’ll come back. We argued a little and later agreed that I can go to my father’s house for the first week of mama’s arrival. After nine o clock news, sleep was a necessity for mama. 

We greeted good night like cat and mouse and in all states I was ready for her. I went in to sleep before Patrick but I always know when he enters. It was around two o clock in the middle of the night that mama shouted from her room. Patrick and I woke up and ran to her room. We saw her sitting on the bed saying she had a nightmare. Someone wanted to strangle her to death. We sat close to her and sincerely I was petting her. It got messy after a while that she was sleeping off on Patrick’s arm. We lay her on the bad and were leaving the room when mama woke up and said:

I’m coming with you people, only me cannot sleep in this room abeg…………

MOTHER IN LAW PART 3

I was already asleep when Patrick came back. That was how the first night was wasted. The next episode of my interaction with my new mother was the issue of honeymoon. The following morning was thanksgiving and after service we sat to discuss again. Every spare time she has, it was for discussion. She started from the fact that we should enjoy ourselves and do whatever we wanted to but not wasteful. Where would you like to go for your honeymoon? I tried to be considerate based on the family I’m coming from, and I said South Africa; her countenance changed like; what am I saying? She continued with don’t you listen to news at all……..

I said, although I haven’t finished discussing with Patrick……… then Patrick walked inside. He greeted his mum and said he needs to see me, and that was a saving grace. I told him I don’t like the way mummy used to call me aside to get to know what was happening in our family, and he said I should try as much as possible to make myself unavailable. 

My trip to Bahamas was a wonderful trip. It was a period of sole concentration and appreciation of marriage. I experienced the inception of love as a full grown woman who has to cater for a man. Two weeks of no mummy….. It was fantastic. The driver had come to pick us from the airport on our arrival, and I was surprised mummy didn’t come with him. But she dropped a note that we should come pick her up as we were coming from a friend’s house in Asokoro. What could that mean I thought? Patrick felt the same way and told the driver to drive home, afterwards go and pick mummy. That was my first mistake. 

When mummy arrived, we greeted her and she pulled a bitter face, with responses as cold as that of an Iraqi to an American. She called me aside again and told me not to ever try what happened today again. You cannot be telling my son to disrespect me. I told the driver that you people should come and meet me at a party, but you came home instead. Patrick is my son and he doesn't disobey, please and please don’t bring the spirit of disobedience into this house else …… 

 I wondered what I’ve done wrong, so I apologized enough to make her feel my loyalty to her one more time. I was now to be very careful in my dealings not to bring hatred between myself and my mother in law. The next few weeks saw peace in the house until Patrick went on shore. It was a trip I would have loved to follow, but it was work. I couldn’t even escort him to the airport. Mummy didn’t agree. I had no job then and wasn’t talking about getting one. My job was gossiping with mummy. I knew the family history and everyone who has messed up at a time was exposed to me. 

The next morning, mummy wore her joggers and snickers, and told me we are jogging today. It was a Saturday thus I changed to a sport wear also. The jogging was a show off. We stopped to greet over forty people, with questions that have no relevance to her life. Everyone knew I was her daughter in law. It was two hours and mummy was really tired. To me it was just a walk, but she was to be bed ridden for the next three days. I went to our chalet to shower and sleep. Surprisingly I didn’t hear mummy’s voice. I called the driver when I woke up to take me somewhere. I had friends thus I could still see them. We were hanging out at Yahuza, when mummy called me. Her voice was so wan and sounded like she was dying. I didn’t hear a word but all I could do was rush back home. When I saw her she complained of pains on her legs, and I ordered her to be taken to Kelina hospital immediately. It took mummy two days to talk, and we were in the hospital for six days. She prayed for me every day, and thanked me, saying if not for me, she would have died. Normal pains don’t kill that way I thought.

It was discharge day and also the day Patrick was coming back. I was to be relieved and shown love again. I have gotten a house for us to move into. I was getting tired of staying with my mother in law. 

I couldn’t go with the driver to the airport again, because I was with mummy. Immediately mummy saw Patrick; her sickness started again. She changed her appearance to that of someone that was dying. I was surprised and subsequently was told to excuse the room for her and her son. Mummy told Patrick I wasn’t caring enough; that even though I stayed with her in the hospital, my mind wasn’t there and lots of things. I couldn’t take it any longer because I now saw it was impossible to please this woman. I told Patrick about the house and he agreed. Three days later we were moving into the house. 

Now I can feel peace, no mother in law’s disturbance, no checkmating…… I walked around almost bare most times. My husband and I were about enjoying the liberty marriage gave. We went shopping for the house at the same mall we first met and our bedroom was purple. Living room was cream with little bit of red. The kitchen was sparkling white …..… it was my first home and I needed to build to my satisfaction. 

Seven days without mummy saw me adding weight. The clothes we bought on projection of weight were now becoming my size. The ass was getting bigger and the breast firmer. I now can pass for a madam. We slept most times in the living room after a session of passionate sex.

It was a Sunday morning and we weren’t planning church. The car horn at the gate sounded familiar. Musa opened the gate and I saw the Land cruiser drive in. I opened the door as I knew there was a message from mummy. Patrick woke up and joined me at the balcony and surprisingly two bags were dropped from the booth and sluggishly mummy came out of the back seat. I rushed to hug her like I really missed her. She ended the call and held me closely also. We walked inside together and the next thing was a slight accusation. You people won’t even come and check up on me. Anyway those are my bags; I was lonely so I’ve come to stay a little here …… those words were the heaviest words I’ve heard. There was no opportunity to restrain mummy and I knew I was in for another session of grief.