SARAH AND TIMI

Dear Timi,

            Today marks exactly 12 years we have been dating. I don’t want any of those fake promises from you any longer that’s the reason I’m sending this letter ahead before I see you. I’m not getting any younger and you know it. The styles that used to fascinate you now cause me muscle pull. Baby I still love you like the first day but I need to write this apology for settlement before I reach menopause. My fecundity level has reduced drastically and you know it would be unfair for any man apart from you to pay my bride price. You have used the part of me that is useful thus I can’t be handed over to another man apart from you. 13 abortions in 12 years and here we are still deliberating on a future we’re practically living to me.

What else can a woman ask for from a man who has seen the best of you? Let us get married. If all you need is to still be sleeping around …… sleep. What are you really doing awake.

Last two years was when I really missed it. Money could not be used as an excuse because we ended the year with millions in our account. But the trip from Calabar to la champagne Tropicana and Abuja blinded reality from my sight and as soon as January came knocking we started the busy schedule again. Now I’m 36 with three younger sisters all married. All these are no story to you because your younger brother also just celebrated his fourth year wedding anniversary. Timi why? Please help take this shame away from me. I’m tired of people calling me auntie and laughing at me behind the scene.

If 2014 would not work please let me know. I have some churches in mind: COZA, House on the Rock, Family Worship and if all these churches don’t work CHRIST EMBASSY is the venue. Please I need your reply when I see you.

SARAH,

            Don’t waste your time coming over as I have decided you will not be part of my 2014. You have been the reason I haven’t been married since. Now I’m 39 and the world seem to believe I’m the bad person. First four years of our relationship were your years of runs. You supported our relationship so well like you didn’t know it was wrong to sleep with all those old men. 13 abortions and now you are blaming me. Sarah, if I was your elder brother; would you advise me to marry you? As you know, there is no nutrient remaining in you any longer. If not for Christianity I wouldn’t be talking with you any longer. A dark and lovely lady that I met at a cross over night twelve years ago has now bleached so well that she is brighter than her future. Those ladies that laugh at you also laugh at me.

I have tried looking into my future but sincerely you are not there. My new resolution is not to talk to you again and I’ve committed you into the hands of the lord.

It shall be well with you in 2014 and as you have decided to be a church goer; may you locate the right man in any of those churches you have picked in Jesus name. Stay off the pastors anyway and throw all those bottles you collected from baba away. It’s good you realised early though before you turned forty because by then it will be too late. Take care and God bless.