MOTHER IN LAW PART 3

I was already asleep when Patrick came back. That was how the first night was wasted. The next episode of my interaction with my new mother was the issue of honeymoon. The following morning was thanksgiving and after service we sat to discuss again. Every spare time she has, it was for discussion. She started from the fact that we should enjoy ourselves and do whatever we wanted to but not wasteful. Where would you like to go for your honeymoon? I tried to be considerate based on the family I’m coming from, and I said South Africa; her countenance changed like; what am I saying? She continued with don’t you listen to news at all……..

I said, although I haven’t finished discussing with Patrick……… then Patrick walked inside. He greeted his mum and said he needs to see me, and that was a saving grace. I told him I don’t like the way mummy used to call me aside to get to know what was happening in our family, and he said I should try as much as possible to make myself unavailable. 

My trip to Bahamas was a wonderful trip. It was a period of sole concentration and appreciation of marriage. I experienced the inception of love as a full grown woman who has to cater for a man. Two weeks of no mummy….. It was fantastic. The driver had come to pick us from the airport on our arrival, and I was surprised mummy didn’t come with him. But she dropped a note that we should come pick her up as we were coming from a friend’s house in Asokoro. What could that mean I thought? Patrick felt the same way and told the driver to drive home, afterwards go and pick mummy. That was my first mistake. 

When mummy arrived, we greeted her and she pulled a bitter face, with responses as cold as that of an Iraqi to an American. She called me aside again and told me not to ever try what happened today again. You cannot be telling my son to disrespect me. I told the driver that you people should come and meet me at a party, but you came home instead. Patrick is my son and he doesn't disobey, please and please don’t bring the spirit of disobedience into this house else …… 

 I wondered what I’ve done wrong, so I apologized enough to make her feel my loyalty to her one more time. I was now to be very careful in my dealings not to bring hatred between myself and my mother in law. The next few weeks saw peace in the house until Patrick went on shore. It was a trip I would have loved to follow, but it was work. I couldn’t even escort him to the airport. Mummy didn’t agree. I had no job then and wasn’t talking about getting one. My job was gossiping with mummy. I knew the family history and everyone who has messed up at a time was exposed to me. 

The next morning, mummy wore her joggers and snickers, and told me we are jogging today. It was a Saturday thus I changed to a sport wear also. The jogging was a show off. We stopped to greet over forty people, with questions that have no relevance to her life. Everyone knew I was her daughter in law. It was two hours and mummy was really tired. To me it was just a walk, but she was to be bed ridden for the next three days. I went to our chalet to shower and sleep. Surprisingly I didn’t hear mummy’s voice. I called the driver when I woke up to take me somewhere. I had friends thus I could still see them. We were hanging out at Yahuza, when mummy called me. Her voice was so wan and sounded like she was dying. I didn’t hear a word but all I could do was rush back home. When I saw her she complained of pains on her legs, and I ordered her to be taken to Kelina hospital immediately. It took mummy two days to talk, and we were in the hospital for six days. She prayed for me every day, and thanked me, saying if not for me, she would have died. Normal pains don’t kill that way I thought.

It was discharge day and also the day Patrick was coming back. I was to be relieved and shown love again. I have gotten a house for us to move into. I was getting tired of staying with my mother in law. 

I couldn’t go with the driver to the airport again, because I was with mummy. Immediately mummy saw Patrick; her sickness started again. She changed her appearance to that of someone that was dying. I was surprised and subsequently was told to excuse the room for her and her son. Mummy told Patrick I wasn’t caring enough; that even though I stayed with her in the hospital, my mind wasn’t there and lots of things. I couldn’t take it any longer because I now saw it was impossible to please this woman. I told Patrick about the house and he agreed. Three days later we were moving into the house. 

Now I can feel peace, no mother in law’s disturbance, no checkmating…… I walked around almost bare most times. My husband and I were about enjoying the liberty marriage gave. We went shopping for the house at the same mall we first met and our bedroom was purple. Living room was cream with little bit of red. The kitchen was sparkling white …..… it was my first home and I needed to build to my satisfaction. 

Seven days without mummy saw me adding weight. The clothes we bought on projection of weight were now becoming my size. The ass was getting bigger and the breast firmer. I now can pass for a madam. We slept most times in the living room after a session of passionate sex.

It was a Sunday morning and we weren’t planning church. The car horn at the gate sounded familiar. Musa opened the gate and I saw the Land cruiser drive in. I opened the door as I knew there was a message from mummy. Patrick woke up and joined me at the balcony and surprisingly two bags were dropped from the booth and sluggishly mummy came out of the back seat. I rushed to hug her like I really missed her. She ended the call and held me closely also. We walked inside together and the next thing was a slight accusation. You people won’t even come and check up on me. Anyway those are my bags; I was lonely so I’ve come to stay a little here …… those words were the heaviest words I’ve heard. There was no opportunity to restrain mummy and I knew I was in for another session of grief.

MOTHER IN LAW PART 2

The buffet was great as I was esteemed. I felt it was my wedding day. She introduced me to Uncle Fash, Engr Ehis, Auntie Gloria, Rev Sis Mammush, Justice Slater and his wife. These people were all in attendance, and three other people who never became relevant. Everyone asked questions and prayed for us. The slow music gave a free flow to the food being served. She made it look like we’ve known for a while. I was so surprised by the action of the family. Even though Patrick was the only son; that doesn't give room for the whole reception given to a normal girl like me, who is not even respected in my own house. I enjoyed the day afterwards, but I was really shy.

The photographer was of national class, and the designer came to take my measurement. She told me I needed to go for masters, and if I needed a job, calls would be made. Everything seems to me like I was Alice in wonderland. Patrick was comfortable with all that was going on, and then I knew I was in the right family. The mum pulled me inside the room with Auntie Gloria and asked when they are coming to see my parents. There is no reason for us to wait any longer. I just thought of something; we are less than three weeks in this relationship and you are talking about marriage. The bamboozled state I was ended with me saying very soon and that was a mistake I never would make again. Gift were coming in from all side for me. My phone was changed that day and the mum told me if I needed money I should tell her. 

How wonderful could a family be if not like the Odekus. The gist was long when telling Betty and our other friend. They were amazed and envious. They felt good things come around me only but today I feel the opposite. 

Patrick’s dad was a former ambassador of Nigeria to Poland, Belgium and Jamaica. He has 11 companies with a net worth of $350million spread around the world. They are so conservative on the outside that you don’t know. The man as I heard was a disciplinarian, thus you don’t exclaim the potentials of a billionaires son in his sight. Patrick said if dad was still alive; all these would not have been possible. I thanked God he was dead. 

I had a free entrance to the Odeku’s residence and I now make decisions in the house. My parents are beginning to be worried about my attachment to Patrick and his family. This made my mum call me to order. She tried advising me about taking things slow, and getting to know the guy and his family better, before getting deeper into the relationship. At this point I knew my mum was jealous. My dad was tired of me already, and he knew my mind has left his house, I saw myself more as Mrs Matilda Oluwatoyin Odeku. 

One faithful afternoon while waiting for Patrick to return from Port Harcourt, his mum came to his room to meet me. She is bored most of the time, thus she needs somebody to talk with. I sat up as she sat close to me on the bed and said let’s talk woman to woman talk. I felt a little panicky with the tone she started with. 

My daughter: hope my son is satisfying when it comes to sex?

How do I answer that question? I was in that house that day waiting patiently to be positioned by Patrick and here is his mum asking if he was good at sex. 

I smiled and said; it’s alright ma. She jumped up and started acting furious. She wore her glasses and brought out a magazine. Opening to the middle page she read out loud: ten ways not to loose your woman to another man …… No 1: satisfy her with sex

I laughed when I discovered it was those magazines they put titles for people to buy. I wasn’t moved any longer as we laughed and played about it. 

When Patrick came back I showed the magazine to him and we both laughed. I watched him strip and I couldn’t hold myself any longer looking at a man I love naked under the shower. Slowly I undressed and joined him in the cleaning process. Rubbing our bodies against each other under the shower, thus finding a penetration that was heavenly was made possible. The bath took almost thirty minutes and when we came out of the shower we were both drained. It was later I discovered the mum has been eavesdropping at my soundtrack.

The whole affair went on like that until the next six months. The pressure on me to get married was now much this time, that I felt I was wrong not getting married. I accepted the offer and told my mum about it. She was trying to drag it, thus I moved straight to my father. In all pleasure he danced to the proposal as he told me to invite the boy for questioning. My dad followed the normal traditional way of getting to know your prospective son in law, but gave him no stress at all. Mummy met all the pastors in Abuja to pray for the wedding, and thank God none of them saw anything wrong. 

The day was fixed and Patrick’s mum took the wedding like a project. She travelled to four countries to buy things for the wedding. We did three pre honeymoons tours before the wedding, and the whole world was to be invited to the Odeku’s only son’s wedding ceremony. Holy trinity was to be the venue, where sixteen Reverend Fathers was to grace the occasion. Three Bishops and two archbishops were also in attendance. The velodrome in the stadium was the reception center and all television stations covered it. It was a glorious event, not to be forgotten in a long while. I was fagged out and tired, but there was this strength I reserved for my first night as a Mrs. I needed to use it for my husband. 

We have agreed to stay a little at their family house before moving out. Our chalet had been arranged beside the mansion, but inside the same compound. The normal washing of feet was done; aunties and mummies welcomed me into the family. I looked back and discovered my friends and family were leaving and what that means is I’m no longer going home. I was now a member of the Odeku’s family. I was going to miss my house but not so much. I didn’t know I was crying until my mother in law held me so close and pet me. I stopped crying and walked into our chalet. My husband was there waiting like a hungry wolf to devour a prey as I entered. He held me so close and we started to kiss. Now that he owns everything, I was so free with him. I gave him every part of my body, and at the peak of the action his phone rang. He looked at it and surprisingly it was his mother. 

Hello Patrick, please come and help me put this DSTV on Africa magic………

MOTHER IN LAW PART 1

I have always heard mothers in law are hard to deal with; thus I made up my mind I would have the best. I don’t know how that would be, but I knew it was possible. The two guys I first dated have lost their mums, and I felt God was answering my prayers on how to deal with this menace called mother in law. 

Retrospectively I had the best mother in law, but presently I declare my husband an orphan. That woman to me is no longer living. She has become most miserable part of my life, and the reality of her existence all the time gives me pain. 

She was my best friend, a mother I never had, a prayer warrior and all you could need in a hubby’s mother. Patrick’s mum was an angel in disguise. I couldn’t believe a mother like her existed. Sincerely she was better than my mum to me. I was pampered in a house that I was about making my home. Part of the reasons the relationship got into marriage was because of Patrick’s mum. She had invited me for all events and occasions going on in their house. I was a daughter to her. From the first year of our relationship, she always supported me when we have issues, and gave me advices that I feel my mum lacked. She drew me so close that I changed my thought on mothers in law. When my friends find it hard to go see their boyfriend’s mum, I felt something was wrong with them. I had pleasure people thrive to have. I loved Patrick’s family house more than my house. I was a queen, and thus I was celebrated. I knew this would continue once Mrs Odeku lives. 

Patrick Odeku was a guy I met in a mall. I was hot and I knew it. He was also a fine boy and we both were rigmarolling around the whole mall. He was with a friend; same with me. I was game for a chat and a hang out, but my culture doesn't support me talking to a guy first. I waited while Betty made the first move. She moved towards Patrick to ask a question only God knows. She tapped Patrick from the back and he excused himself immediately towards me. He was polite with his greeting as he introduced himself. He was so straight to the point and his courage swept me off my feet like epilepsy. He rolled my trolley for me, and then I started picking everything I didn’t even need from the mall. He paid for everything, and invited me and Betty for a drink. Who am I to say no……… I blushed and played and sincerely that was one of the best days of my life. He didn’t ask me out but he never stopped telling me “you are so beautiful”. 

Betty found it difficult to relate with Julius, she’s the out spoken type but with her lack of beauty, most men don’t get interested. They both worked with Chevron and their cadence was special.  Patrick was not the perfect guy I always thought of as my Romeo, but honestly I will be insatiable to let him loose. We stayed a while at salamander café before he drove me gently to my father’s house. Zone six was a place he would soon be visiting on a regular basis and Maitama was about turning to my home. After dropping Julius and Betty, he came back to my house. I had forgotten my other phone in his car. I gave a hug that sent a message across.

We spoke almost all night and didn’t deny the truth that feelings roamed our thoughts. I liked him enormously but there was going to be a problem. Patrick is a smooth talker and a ladies’ man. He has almost everything ladies need and that’s not a good think to behold in Abuja. The ladies here can fight themselves even for a cripple not to talk of Patrick. So I swore to protect my relationship with everything I can. 

The next few days were like honeymoon. I built up the friendship so well that I forgot I had female friends. He did everything I wanted, and I felt like a woman when I’m with him. All my friends and family knew there is a guy that has taken my breath away; but I know as much as Patrick we are still friends. Nine days after we met was the first time he introduced me as his girlfriend and I was shocked. 

We had gone to his house to pick up some documents he wants to send to a friend. As usual I sat in the car, and looking at the balcony I saw a woman reading a magazine at the balcony. It seems she was looking at me. So I came down from the car; with my two knees touching the ground, greeted her good afternoon ma. She replied with a wave and a prolonged greeting. 

When Patrick returned to the car, he was to bring me upstairs to see mum. I rearranged my clothes and checked my lipstick not to look too sophisticated. I walked gently swallowing the chewing gum that was now the noise maker, and knelt a second time to greet her. She pulled me up and hugged me while Patrick did the introduction. Mummy this is my girlfriend Matilda …… and most likely the last girlfriend I will have. The mum danced a little; like she was surprised at what her son said. She looked at me again and pulled me close. Matilda my daughter, how are you doing? How is mummy and daddy? What of your siblings. She was a mother. She prayed a little for both of us, as Patrick told her we are rushing to the airport to send a parcel. She got my number and promised me lunch the next day. I was dumbfounded as I said no problems mum.

The acceptance was subconscious, and with a first peck we were leaving the mum’s presence. As we drove out of the gate, I looked at Patrick and asked, are you serious about what you told your mum? He stopped the car in the middle of the road and said yes. I smiled and told him he should have said that to me first, and as if we were horny birds we started kissing. It was the honk from a trailer that gave us consciousness. We laughed as we continued the drive to the airport. 

We kissed multiple times that night in front of my house as I couldn’t wait for tomorrow to come. The lunch wasn’t the excitement; Patrick was it. The night was slow as I couldn’t sleep. I needed to be with Patrick but with his mum first. I rehearsed what to tell the mother tomorrow, and with my script I was good to go. 

It was 1.30 pm and Patrick was outside. He had called me and I walked outside with my baby sister. She loves chocolate, thus he bought the normal snickers for her. Seeing Patrick I got the strength that was missing and now I needed to know if this mummy is who I wanted or not.  The gateman opened the gate and Patrick drove in. We were chatting as we walked into the living room. Nine adults I later got to know stood up, and welcomed me to the house. The supposed lunch was converted to a feast all by my mother in law ……..

PAINS AND GAINS PART 6

I fell on the bed and slept. I thought the only form of consolation for this wicked act could only come from a sleep. My dream was scarier than the reality. I woke up into the certainty I just been defrauded. I had to bear the consequences of what I do to people. I was broken; I still had some money but cannot rent a house again, buy a car then start buying things inside the house one after the other. Whatever these guys had done to me, was more advanced compared to what I knew. I had to learn it.

I walked into our popular cybercafé (Monte Carlo), if there is no solution here then ……… I called a friend and told him my experience with the whole Mrs Pamela stuff, and he laughed and laughed and laughed. He told me to buy him a drink and he would expose me to what they did to me. Opposite the café was a wine shop, thus I sat him down there and politely he said we’ll need to travel the next day.

Usen is a village on your way to Okada; all in Edo state. It’s the headquarters of African traditional religion in the state. If Christianity and Islam are acting too slowly; in Usen they hasten matters. It wasn’t a good ride as the road had so many potholes. But it was less than an hour for us to get there. The hut was rickety in look, and the people around look like idols. I’ve not seen that form of parochial setting before in my entirety. And something came to my mind; I am coming to meet poor people to teach me how to get rich. Do they forbid riches? Gradually it became clearer I’m about to do some rituals for money. But let me wait and listen to them, as I told the old woman my own side of the story.

She is not just old; she is ancient. With all her hair fully grey, and so many of her teeth pulled off her mouth, she walked out into her imaginary living room, stinking of odours, from many dead animals. She bowed to almost eight idols she called her fathers and mothers, before she gave room to listen to whatever we came for. 

My friend started the narration in the local language, but after sometime we switched to Pidgin English. Then I could understand better. She told us after listening to our full story and answering so many questions that we will succeed in this business we are doing. It’s just a simple thing we need to do. We would have to appease the gods and be closer to them. I thought to myself (hope not these stinking gods).  We must romance the gods, for the gods to move on our behalf to any nation we so desire. Any voice we want to imitate becomes imitated; anybody we want hypnotized, gets hypnotized, in short whatever we want gets done. 

I became a little furious; it sounds so well like a lie. How can we hypnotize whoever we went to hypnotize. Can we use these on Obasanjo or Bill Clinton? But she continued by saying we should bring our phone, she would soak it inside a concoction and whoever we speak with is submitting to our demands. Then I knew those guys have been here. It wasn’t a natural scam that they pulled on me. But how on earth would I drop my communicator inside one concoction to spoil it or what? 

The woman called one of her small deity looking girls, and told her to bring something. The gourd she brought contained small oil as she pulled her top. The long breast was resting on her body and she poured the oil on it and rubbed. She asked us both to bring fifty naira each for the activities of the gods, and I wondered how cheap they could be. I brought out a hundred naira for both of us, and she dropped it at the shrine again. She called my friend first and told him to come closer and suck her breast. He considered not going first, but afterwards proceeded and started sucking the dirtiest and most non appealing substance I’ve ever seen. I nearly puked when she started moaning exposing her teeth as dirty as it was, and my friend sincerely sucking the breast like it was a secondary school girl’s breast. He lasted almost twenty minutes before the woman finally pushed him away, and said some blessings on him. 

It was my turn I knew, but I wouldn’t do that for anything. She opened the gourd again and she poured the oil now on her private part. I didn’t wait for her to tell me what to do before I ran out of the house. I prefer to live in poverty than put my mouth at an old dirty woman’s private part. The race was not for the swift as the guards pursued me. I ran out of the compound following a supposed road until I discovered everywhere was becoming bush the more I run. I was also getting tired so quickly. My whole mind told me something was wrong but I didn’t want to accept. I started stepping on bushes and after a while I hit a road. The first car I saw stopped to help me, and I told him to please just run. He said he cannot go to Benin now because he came to see one old woman who is living inside the bush somewhere here in usen. A chill ran through my veins. I came down abruptly from his car, and I suffered so many injuries. The onlookers came to my rescue as they thought the man was a kidnapper. The effect of the fall had got me wounded and they rushed me to the hospital. It was when I woke up in the hospital that I saw two policemen beside my bed. My friend that sucked mama’s breast is dead and I’m accused of his death. 

My whole experience started from unemployment to a murder case. It took him two hours to die after sucking the breast; imagine me giving a head it would have been immediate. I tried locating mama’s house again but to no avail. I’m to be killed for what I know nothing about. For all I’ve scammed in the past I wish you forgive me. My name is Peter Jumbo………………

.... we apologize for the delay in the publication of the concluding part of this story.... it was based on network and a little bit of illness. stay connected as we serve the best by noon today titled: MOTHER IN LAW.. 

add the storyteller on 2A5ED99A or follow :@wolfaxdiaries